kama sutra kissing

Quoted from a book “kissing”: (author: ANDRÉA DEMIRJIAN)

 

For the ultimate in passionate kissing, we turn to the Kama-Sutra. Written in India sometime before the 6th century by Vatsyana (a Brahmin priest who was supposedly celibate), this sizzlin’ self-help love guide was so much more than a tantalizing rundown on the multiple ways to make boinga-boinga. It schooled young men in the singles scene, showing them how to decorate their bachelor pads, how to be well-versed in cultural subjects to chat up the ladies, and even how to groom themselves. You might say it was an ancient Queer Eye for the Straight Guy!

But did you know that the Kama Sutra is also one of the first kissing manuals? India was the kissing hotbed of the ancient East. And this love guide is filled with all sorts of juicy mouth-to-mouth techniques. While the Kama Sutra was intended for boys, you can be sure beautifully exotic Indian girls were reading this under their saris at night. They wanted to improve their kissing talents, too! For more intimate and sensuous kissing that will be most admired, try these ancient yet hot as ever Kama-Sutra kisses with a certain someone:

• Throbbing Kiss: “When a girl, setting aside her bashfulness a little, wishes to touch the lip that is pressed into her mouth, and with that object moves her lower lip, but not the upperone.” * Focus on your honey’s lower lip. Give all pleasure to that part of their mouth only. Don’t be shy about it!

• Touching Kiss: “When a girl touches her lover’s lip with her tongue, and having shut her eyes, places her hands on those of her lover.” * When you come in to kiss your lovebug, gently sweep your tongue across his lips. And hold his hands. This is a very loving kiss.

• Turned Kiss: “When one of them turns up the face of the other by holding the head and

chin, and the kissing.” * With one hand, clasp your sweetie’s hand in yours. With the other hand, gently take his chin. And turn it toward you for a kiss. Try this when you’re in the mood to make the first move!

• Pressed Kiss: “When the lower lip is pressed with much force.” * While kissing, just concentrate on the lower lip for a minute. The upper lip will cry out, “Hey, what about me?” This kind of teasing makes for a little variety during some hot kissing.

• Kiss of the Upper Lip: “When a man kisses the upper lip of a woman, while she in return kisses his lower lip.” * For some real sweet intimacy, get your cutie pie to kiss your bottom lip, and when he’s doing that, kiss his upper lip. You’ll look like happy fishes!

• Clasping Kiss: “When one of them takes both the lips of the other between his or her own.” * During a deep, silky, sensual kiss, envelop your guy’s lips with yours. This is super-duper intense kissing!

• Fighting of the Tongue: “When during the ClaspingKiss, if one of them touches the teeth, the tongue, and the palate of this other, with his or her tongue.” * In the heat of it, take your lover’s lips between yours. And thrust your tongue in their mouth. You might end up wrestling each other to the ground.

• Kiss that Kindles Love: “When a woman looks at the face of her lover while he is asleep, and kisses it to show her intention or desire.” * When you find your pookie bear sound asleep, gently kiss their face (even if they’re snoring!). They might not stir. But they’ll dream of you and your kisses.

• Kiss that Turns Away: “When a woman kisses her lover while he is engaged in business, or while he is quarreling with her, or while he is looking at something else, so that his mind might be turned away.” * If your man checks out some hottie across the room, don’t stress it. Just grab his attention with one of your kisses. He’ll be totally focused on you. And forget the hoochie. This move is also good during a disagreement. A silly spat will be replaced by cooing love whispers.

• Kiss that Awakens: “When a lover coming home late at night kisses his beloved who is asleep in her bed in order to show his desire.” * If you find your lovebug fast asleep, pretend you’re the Prince and he’s Sleeping Beauty. Kiss him gently but fully on the lips. This is sure to arouse him from a deep slumber.

 

Read more!

some blonde jokes

Why do women have two sets of lips?

One set to bitch at you with, and the other to apologize with.

 

There was 3 ladies on an island 1 blonde 1 brunette and a red-head. The city where they wanted to be was 20 milesaway with sea between the the island and the city. The red-head swam 4 miles and drowned of exhaustion, the brunette sawm 10 miles and drowned of exhaustion, the blonde swam 19 miles, got tired, and swam back!!

 

What do you call a blonde with brain cells?

Pregnant

 

Blonde and Genie

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead were stuck on an island for many, many years until one day they found a magic lamp. They rubbed it hard and out popped a genie. He said that he could only give three wishes so since there were three girls, each would get one wish. The redhead went first. 'I hate it here. It is too hot and boring. I want to go home!' 'Okay,' replied the genie. And off she went. Then the brunette went. 'I miss my family, my friends and relatives. I want to go home, too!!' And off she went. The blonde started crying and said, 'I wish my friends were back here!'

 

Two blondes are racing down a bumpy back road in a pretty beat up car down to a bank they're going to rob.

"Drive slower" pleads the one in the passenger seat, "I don't

want all the nitro in the boot to explode."

"Relax," the driver replies, "even if it did, I've got a spare box

under the seat . . . "

 

A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of world capitals. She proudly says, "Go ahead, ask me, I know all of them."

A friend says, "OK, what's the capital of London?"

The blonde replies, "Oh, that's easy: L."

 

A British Airways employee took a call from a blonde asking the question, "How long is the Concorde flight fromLondon to New York?" "Um, just a minute, if you please," he murmured. Then, as he turned to check the exact flight time, he heard an equally polite, "Thank you," as the phone went dead.

 

"How come you're late?" asks the bartender as the blonde waitresswalks in the door.

"It was awful," she explains. "I was walking down Elm streetandthere was this terrible accident. A man was lying in the middle of thestreet. He'd been thrown from his car. His leg was broken, his skull was fractured, and there was blood everywhere. Thank God I took that first-aid course and all my training came back to me in a minute."

"What did you do?" asks the bartender.

"I sat down and put my head between my knees to keep from fainting!"

 

Two blonde girls were talking and one couldn't help but notice how pretty and beautiful the others skin was. So she asked her outright what made her skin so soft and beautiful."Well, once a week I fill the bathtub with milk and just soak in it."

So the blonde went to a farm and spoke to the farmer. "I'd like a lot of milk."

"How much?" asked the farmer.

"Well, quite a lot because I'm going to soak in it."

He asked, "Pasteurized?"

"No...just up to my boobies."

 

Blonde's VCR

A blonde decides to do something wild she hasn't done before, so she sets out to rent her first X-rated adult video. She goes to the video shop and, after looking around for a while, selects a title that sounds very stimulating.

She drives home, lights some candles, slips into something comfortable, and puts the tape in the VCR. To her disappointment, there's nothing but static on the screen, so she calls the video shop to complain.

Blonde: "I just rented an adult movie from you and there's nothing on the tape, but static."

Shop assistant: "Sorry about, that. We've had problems with some of those tapes. Which title did you rent?"

Blonde says "It's called 'Head Cleaner."

 

Fifteen minutes into the flight from Kansas City to Toronto, the captain announced, "Ladies and gentlemen, one of our engines has failed. There is nothing to worry about. Our flight will take an hour longer than scheduled, but we still have three engines left."

Thirty minutes later the captain announced, "One more engine has failed and the flight will take an additional two hours. But don't worry . . . we can fly just fine on two engines."

An hour later the captain announced, "One more engine has failed and our arrival will be delayed another three hours. But don't worry... we still have one engine left."

A young blonde passenger turned to the man in the next seat and remarked, "If we lose one more engine, we'll be up here all day!"

 

Two blonde girls walk into a department store. They walk up to the perfume counter and pick up a sample bottle. Nancy sprays it on her wrist and smells it, ‘That's quite nice, don't you think, Kathy?’

Kathy takes a sniff and replies, ‘That is nice. What's it called?’

‘Viens a moi,’ replies Nancy.

‘Viens a moi? What the heck does that mean?’

At this stage the assistant offers some help. ‘Viens a moi, ladies, means 'come to me' in French.’

Nancy takes another sniff, then offers her arm to Kathy again, and remarks, ‘That doesn't smell like come to me. Does that smell like come to you?’

 

A blonde went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain. "I would like to buy this TV," she told the salesman.

"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied. She hurried home and dyed her hair, then came back and again told the salesman "I would like to buy this TV."

"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied. "Darn, he recognized me," she thought. She went for a complete disguise this time, haircut and new color, new outfit, big sunglasses, then waited a few days before she again approached the salesman.

"I would like to buy this TV." "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied. Frustrated, she exclaimed "How do you know I'm a blonde?" "Because that's a microwave," he replied.

 

This blonde decides one day that she is sick and tired of all these blonde jokes and how all blondes are perceived as stupid, so she decides to show her husband that blondes really are smart.

While her husband is off at work, she decides that she is going to paint a couple of rooms in the house. The next day, right after her husband leaves for work, she gets down to the task at hand. Her husband arrives home at 5:30 and smells the distinctive smell of paint. He walks into the living room and finds his wife lying on the floor in a pool of sweat.

He notices that she is wearing a ski jacket and a fur coat at the same time. He goes over and asks her if she is ok. She replies yes. He asks what she is doing. She replies that she wanted to prove to him that not all blonde women are dumb and she wanted to do it by painting the house.

He then asks her why she has a ski jacket and a fur coat on.

She replies that she was reading the directions on the paint can and it said "For best results, put on two coats."

 

Read more!

Hair style

I’m interested in getting this hair style.  Does it look nice? I have always preferred short hair. I don’t know why. But I feel short hair looks nicer. It is a bit different. Not many girls have short hair. It’s a bit different. Some might say weird.

Quote: http://dchero.wordpress.com/2008/02/07/chicks-with-short-hair/

 

“Holy shit, nothing makes a girl more instantly unattractive than having short hair. Out of the 15-20 girls who I saw before and after getting a short haircut, approximately 0% of them looked better with short hair. Actually, exactly 0% of them looked better with short hair. It sucks, and it should be outlawed from this country.”

 

 

I found this when searching for nice hairstyles. Looks like not many people like girls with short hair.But that was a opinion from a guy.

 

Note: I had shaved my head a few months back .Please don ask me to show you my picture with bald head. It was a catastrophe ><

Read more!

SAD SAD Day

I was quite happy that I cleared my credits. Which meant I don need to go any class till exams. Just attend the hospital duties. Hospital duties are 5 hrs per week, and also have to give the exams, during the exam session in June. But unfortunately for me, they brought forward one of the exam. So I’ll have to prepare for that exam in 14 days and need give that exam on 12^th may. That really sucks.

 

To think about it, it shouldn’t be a problem for me as the material is some thing which I’m strong at. If any one is wondering which stupid subject is that, it is called Topographic Anatomy & operative surgery. One of a subject which makes u think human kind is much more complicated than anything else.

 

So now I decided to upload all my progress and work into my webpage which is under-construction for a long time. Truth is I never even started to build it. Only thing that I did in that web page is: putting the under-construction notice. So now its time for me to do some work. I’ll be posting in blog as usual. But exam times are boring times in student life. There won’t be much time for anything other than study. My case is a bit different. I’m a kind of person, who finds it impossible to sit in a place and study for say, more than 30 minutes. So let’s wait for 14 more days and see what will be the result of the exam.

 

Note: unlike many other countries, the exam in my country is a bit different. It is completely oral. We have to answer about 100 multiple choice question before the exam, then once you pass that exam you will pass on to step number 2. Which is actually the exam, and has 2 parts: oral part is where you have to answer some questions to the professor orally and the second part is practical test. Practical part is quite simple. You will have to name a set of instruments and do some thing like vascular stitch, intestinal stitch or some thing else. 

So does this day deserve to be a sad day in my life? or am I just whining? 

Read more!

lets shoot men

How are husbands like lawn mowers?

They're hard to get started, they emit noxious odors, and half the time they don't work.

 

How do men define a "50/50" relationship?

We cook-they eat; we clean-they dirty; we iron-they wrinkle.

 

How do men exercise on the beach?

By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini.

 

How do you get a man to stop biting his nails?

Make him wear shoes.

 

How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?

Rename the mail folder "Instruction Manuals."

 

How does a man show he's planning for the future?

He buys two cases of beer instead of one.

 

How is Colonel Sanders like the typical male?

All he's concerned with is legs, breasts and thighs.

 

How many men does it take to open a beer?

None. It should be opened by the time she brings it to the couch.

 

How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One-He just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him.

 

How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three. One to screw in the bulb, and two to listen to him brag about the screwing part.

 

How many men does it take to tile a bathroom?

Two. If you slice them very thinly.

 

What did God say after creating man?

I can do so much better.

 

What do most men consider a gourmet restaurant?

Any place without a drive-up window.

 

What do you call a handcuffed man?

Trustworthy.

 

What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?

You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.

 

What do you call a man with half a brain?

Gifted.

 

What do you do with a bachelor who thinks he's God's gift to women?

Exchange him.

 

What makes a man think about a candlelight dinner?

A power failure.

 

What should you give a man who has everything?

A woman to show him how to work it.

 

How can you tell when a man is well hung?

When you can just barely slip your finger in between his neck and the noose.

 

Why do men need instant replay on TV sports?

Because after 30 seconds they forget what happened.

 

Why do men whistle when they're sitting on the toilet?

Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe.

 

Why do only 10% of men make it to heaven?

Because if they all went, it would be Hell.

 

Why does it take 100 million sperms to fertilize one egg?

Because not one will stop and ask for directions.

 

What do men and mascara have in common?

They both run at the first sign of emotion.

 

What do men and pantyhose have in common?

They either cling, run, or don't fit right in the crotch!

 

What do you instantly know about a well-dressed man?

His wife is good at picking out clothes.

 

What has eight arms and an IQ of 60?

Four guys watching a football game.

 

What is the difference between a sofa and a man watching Monday Night Football?

The sofa doesn't keep asking for beer.

 

What is the difference between men and women?

A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need. A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.

 

What's a man's definition of a romantic evening?

Sex.

 

What's a man's idea of honestly in a relationship?

Telling you his real name.

 

What's the best way to force a man to do sit ups?

Put the remote control between his toes.

 

What's the best way to kill a man?

Put a naked blonde and a six-pack in front of him. Then tell him to pick only one.

 

What's the difference between Big Foot and intelligent man?

Big Foot's been spotted a several times.

 

What's the smartest thing a man can say?

"My wife says..."

 

What's the quickest way to a man's heart?

Straight through the rib cage.

 

Why are all dumb blonde jokes one liners?

So men can understand them.

 

Why can't men get mad cow disease?

Because they're all pigs.

 

Why did God create man before woman?

He didn't want any advice.

 

Why did God create man before woman?

Because you're always supposed to have a rough draft before creating your masterpiece.

 

Why do doctors slap babies' butts right after they're born?

To knock the penises off the smart ones.

 

Why do female black widow spiders kill the males after mating?

To stop the snoring before it starts.

 

Why do jocks play on artificial turf?

To keep them from grazing.

 

Why do little boys whine?

Because they are practicing to be men.

 

Why do men like smart women?

Opposites attract.

 

Why is it good that there are female astronauts?

When the crew gets lost in space, at least the woman will ask for directions.

 

Why is psychoanalysis a lot quicker for men than for women?

When it's time to go back to his childhood, he's already there.

 

Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good looking?

They all already have boyfriends.

Read more!

your own end

I read this some where else. I was quite shocked to see such advertisement. I’ve never seen such advertisements in Russia.

The person who posted this says “I got this magazine delivered to me by the hotel management during my stay in cyprus”

 

In Russia usually people don’t even discuss their own funeral. If they do they are either crazy or severely ill. So the question is this: have you already thought about your own end? If you haven’t, then  why?

 

Read more!

maple and me

It is quite funny, that I feel, I fit in nicely among the South East Asians. Some of those who play maple with me don’t even believe I’m not from SEA. I can understand their slang well and as well use it when I chat with them. I think I should migrate to Asia. I feel that Asians are friendlier than Europeans. I have a friend who donates me 10k a-cash every week. I got friends who let me leech any time I want. I’m quite lucky to get such friends. After all they have never seen me before. I wonder how they will treat me in real, if I ever meet them. There is a lot of difference in every one’s behavior. Will they all be the same in real? Hope they will be. Some times when I chat with them I feel very happy.

 Is it because I became a net junkie? May be I’m a net junkie, but I don’t regret and I wont regret  : ). I’ll rather be happy to have such friends, and feel happy about it, and be a net junkie than not being a net junkie and not having such friends. Ha-ha!!!

When I talk about maple and my friends I got from maple. I should thank those guilds which let me join and gave me a chance to interact with quite a number of people, namely Fatal, Infinity, Legendheroes, iaurora. I shall not list the friends by name just because it will be a damn long list, and I’m a lazy bum who doesn’t have the patience to do that.

Some times I wonder how the hell I got so many friends online and so few in real. Some of my friends say that I spend a lot of time online and that’s why I have a lot of friends online but that isn’t true. I wasn’t spending that much time online 3 years ago. I spend a lot of time online only after I started to play maple. But even then (3yrs back) when I was in school I didn’t have a lot of friends.

After I started to play maple I changed a lot. Friends of mine who introduce maple to me have already quit the game. But I’m still playing. And I don’t think I’ll be quitting maple any soon. I tried playing cabal for 3 weeks, when I went Spain. But when I reached back Moscow I’m back to maple and quitted playing cabal. Even though many think that cabal is a nice game, to me maple is nicer as it is cuter and the people who play maple are mostly friendly.

 

 

Read more!

meaning of life

What is the meaning of life? Why should we live? We live like machines from our birth.

1)              Study

2)              Work

3)              Marriage

4)              Kids

5)              Make the kids study

6)              See the kids work

7)              Die

Does it really worth living? I don’t know. But I don’t have enough guts to commit suicide. Wish I had. It should be easier to die than live in this evil world. Once I even bought a book “100 ways to suicide”. But nothing is feasible. What is the point of living if you are not some one special? 

 

 “Suicide is not chosen; it happens

 when pain exceeds 

resources for coping with pain.”

Read more!

customizing blog

Was trying to edit my blog and make it look good for quite some time. I started learning HTML, XHTML, and CSS. I’m planning to learn JS then will spice up blog a bit. 2 days back the blog looked like a rape victim. But today it is a bit organized. I’m happy to see that the blog looks decent now. I believe I can make it look better. Soon after learning JS will experiment things and try to make it look better :). 

 

Read more!

will you love some one with out seeing/ hearing them?

I wonder how many people will fall in love with those they meet in internet chat rooms/ online games where u don see the person in a web cam or hear the person. Which means the other end might be ugly/ same sex/ old / diseased. I won’t dare. What about others?

Read more!

wad the heck

What should I tell about myself? 

 

Why should I tell about myself?  

 

Got any use keeping a blog?  

 

Or is it just a waste of time?

quoted from bugbug/farmer's blog:  


First post isn’t the same as first impression.

Having considered to blog for quite some time, i give myself a pat on the back for actually creating a blog. Back then, it’s always me seeing other blogs being harassed by people who really have nothing better to do.
I suppose that’s why i didn’t create a blog sooner.

Blah.

This isn’t my bottle to store emo juice. This isn’t a place where i can’t rant out my anger. This isn’t a place where i indirectly give hints about what’s what. Maybe it is. Maybe it’s alot more.
I would rather only a small amount of people who want to know what’s going on,to actually know about this blog.

Oh yes. I don’t think there’s a need of writing down the reasons i chose wordpress over blogspot.
It’s quite obvious.
There goes the first step of AntBug in his wordpress journey.

Read more!